The Salty Peanut Gallery

Is it wrong to just go through the motions?

Most days I enjoy what I do. I enjoy leading God’s people in praise. I enjoy directing the choir and the spirit we share. I enjoy teaming with other musicians to play and sing music. I enjoy listening to songs and searching for just the right pieces that will inspire praise. I enjoy planning and executing our times of worship.

But sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I’m too tired. Sometimes I have other things in my life that are crowding in to steal my joy, personal things, relational things, conflicts, crises, troubles, trials all fighting for my attention and making it difficult to praise. Sometimes I just don’t feel like it.

So I plow ahead as always. I put on my happy face and do my duty. I hunker down, man my post, keep on keepin’ on…

Why? Because it’s what’s expected. It’s what good soldiers do.

But is that wrong? Is it insincere? Am I being dishonest? Am I living a lie? And what if I were to be completely honest? “Ya know, folks, I’m just not feelin’ it today. I’m gonna sit this one out.” Would that be more acceptable? More authentic? More pleasing to God?

Sunday was one of those days. I know I shouldn’t admit such things, but it’s true. I’d had a long, hard week on top of some personal struggles that I’ve been dealing with, and to be quite honest, I needed a break. So when the weather man began predicting on Friday the possibility of snow on Sunday, I couldn’t help getting maybe a little bit hopeful.

It was kind of strange actually, seeing as how it’s spring and all, and we had just had a couple of days of seventy degree weather. The blooms were budding; the grass was growing. It’s not supposed to snow now. And yet, what if…

“Maybe we can sleep in on Sunday and have a nice, quiet day at home.” I didn’t want to get my hopes up too high because, number one, pastors aren’t supposed to feel that way about Sundays. And too, the weather man has pretty much missed the boat all winter long. Why should he get it right this time? Still I found myself only really going through the motions of my Saturday night preparations for Sunday. I’m getting ready because I have to, not because I want to.

And then it was Sunday, and as “luck” would have it, we barely got little more than a light dusting. “Looks like it’s business as usual,” I thought. And so we got ready and trudged on in, kind of like when we were kids the first day back to school after Christmas break. And there we were once again, manning our post, doing our duty.

Paul said, “God loves a cheerful giver.” But does that mean if we’re not feeling cheerful we shouldn’t give? That doesn’t seem right. There are plenty of times when we don’t feel married, but does that mean our love is insincere? Of course not, because love is more than just a feeling. Maybe cheerful giving is like that as well. We give not out of guilt or compulsion, but because we love God and because we love His people. Regardless of how we “feel” we give cheerfully because we know it gives pleasure to the One we love, to the One who loves us and gave Himself for us.

Paul told the Philippians that their giving was “a sweet-smelling aroma, an acceptable sacrifice, well pleasing to God” (Philippians 4:18). True worship originates in the soul. It is an act by which we offer praise to God. This is the worship that is acceptable to God. When our giving reflects a heart of thanksgiving to God, this is our reasonable act of worship. It’s not a feeling or an emotion; it’s an act of love.

So I went through the motions, not because I was being in any way insincere, but because of love and humility. I determined to count others more significant than myself and look not only to my own interests, but to the interests of others (Philippians 2:3-4). And somewhere in the middle of all that I found myself being ministered to by the Holy Spirit. Maybe it was the offertory special that moved me to close my eyes in worship. Maybe it was the sound of instrumentalists literally pouring themselves into a time of praise. Maybe it was the heart with which the choir sang to the glory of God. Even though I didn’t feel much like serving on Sunday, I did it anyway. And you know what? God used it in return to nourish my own thirsty soul. And before I knew it, I was “feeling” cheerful again. Go figure.

Classic Muppet Show. Happy belated St. Patrick’s Day. This stuff makes me laugh!

“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” – Ephesians 6:4.

I miss my babies. I had decided early on never to become one of those absentee fathers, mostly as a result of my own childhood experience. In fact I often bristled at the phrase “typical man”. “Not me,” I thought. “I for one will be the exception to the rule. I’ll not shy away from housework, from cooking or cleaning or doing dishes. I refuse to hand off the baby whenever it needs a diaper change. And don’t ever accuse me of ‘babysitting the kids’. They’re my kids too. I only get one crack at this and I’m doing it right. I’m going to be the best father a kid ever had.”

Whether or not I actually lived up to that last part, only my children can tell. All I can say is that I did my dead level best to embrace parenthood. I was determined not to miss a single moment. And anytime I had a momentary lapse, anytime I was tempted to relent in any way because I was either too tired or too busy or had something else I’d rather be doing, I would often remind myself, “This is the good stuff.” That has been my mantra.

Over the years I have treasured up all these things, pondering them in my heart: holding that precious bundle for the very first time and being so afraid that I might not know what I’m doing; enduring sleepless nights with midnight feedings and late night colic; rejoicing in a myriad of firsts…first time sleeping through the night, first bath, first tooth, first word, first time sitting, first time crawling, first time standing, first time walking, first day of school…; reading bedtime stories…Dr. Seuss, Thomas the Tank Engine, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, James and the Giant Peach, The Chronicles of Narnia…; giving night night hugs and kisses…butterfly kisses, Eskimo kisses, fishy kisses…; setting up the swing set in the backyard; “Push me, Daddy, higher”; swinging upside down with feet in the air and hair hanging down; splashing in the wading pool on a hot summer day; remembering the wonder of Christmas morning through the eyes of a child; searching for Easter eggs; collecting oodles of Halloween candy; playing “Wrestle Daddy” on the living room rug, my dare devil daughter doing swan dives off the sofa onto my chest; giving piggyback rides and shoulder rides; teaching them to ride a bicycle; riding without training wheels for the very first time (I’ll never forget the elation on my daughter’s face.); riding down to the lake to go fishing; helping with homework; studying for tests; playing family board games; going on family outings to the mountains, to the park, to the zoo, to the beach, to amusement parks…Bush Gardens, Six Flags, Hershey Park, Kings Dominion, Disney, Universal…; playing sports, basketball, soccer; traveling to games all over the state; getting their learners permit; learning to drive; graduating from high school; watching them grow up; learning to let go…

They’re not ours, you know. It’s hard to remember that when what seems like just a short time ago they were so completely dependent on us for their very existence. It’s hard sometimes to remember that they are our responsibility, not our possession, but only for a time. At some point we are forced to give them to God and trust that we did enough.

I miss my babies…

For my part, I have few regrets. I purposed in my heart not to miss those years, and for the most part I don’t think I did. I have so many memories that I will cherish forever. Now that my kids are older and are leaving the nest, I trust that from time to time they’ll come back for a visit, not as children, but as best friends. And I’m looking forward to one day becoming a granddad. As I embraced fatherhood, I will do my dead level best to embrace being a grandparent. I’m looking forward to having more playmates. I’m going to be the best grandfather a kid ever had. I am determined not to miss a single moment, because this is the good stuff.

I first got interested in blogging back in 2007 as a sort of outlet for getting things off my chest. I like to write, I like poking fun at things and I thought blogging would be a great venue for expressing myself. Early on I posted an article that at the time was really nothing more than me venting my frustration with the Christian music industry. It was entitled “Love Songs to Jesus”. It’s not the most commented post I’ve ever written, but it’s one in which, three years after the fact, I’m still receiving vehement responses. Admittedly, it was written during a time in my life when I was considerably more cynical (and probably much less gracious) than I should have been. To be honest it isn’t even my best work. It was written hastily and was loaded with typos. In fact as recent as last April I got blasted by a would be commenter over the number of mistakes. It was suggested, “If you want to find people who need to work on their skills, start with your own writing.” Touché. Oh and thanks for the spell check on a then two-year-old post.

The gist of my post was centered on the trend in contemporary Christian music toward what can be described as singing “love songs” to Jesus. In it I asked if anyone could please show me the biblical precedent for worshiping the Lord with superficial, touchy-feely love songs. “Touch me…hold me…love me…hold me in your warm embrace…” that sort of thing. Are there any examples of this being done anywhere in scripture?

Just this week I got two more responses to this post, one in agreement and one that was critical. The critical commenter named Linda raised an interesting example from scripture that in all honesty I hadn’t really considered, which got me thinking; maybe it’s time we revisit this subject. So I’ve chosen to respond to Linda in the body of this post.

Linda wrote:

“C’mon!! Do you remember how Christ responded to the lady that poured perfume on him and washed his feet with her tears and hair? Her HAIR! Do you not believe that was “mushy” love for him? That act offended his apostles, but Jesus said to leave her alone. Now consider this: Jesus was a man. The word says that he was tempted in every way that we are. Do you suppose that he was ‘enjoying’ that? Sure he was, but he never allowed himself to sin. How many times does the word tell us that we are the bride of Christ? He is returning to take us to a home that he’s prepared for us! How romantic is that? There is nothing wrong with focusing your whole-heart love on a man that gave up his life for you.”

Here’s my response:

Linda,

Great example from scripture, although I’m having some trouble with some of your conclusions, not the least of which is the idea that a) this was somehow an expression of “mushy” love. I think if you’ll go back and reread the context of Luke 7:36-50 you’ll see that there was much, much more to it than that. And b) Jesus was somehow “enjoying” this expression. Again, if you’ll reexamine the text you’ll find Jesus response as being one of compassion, not enjoyment.

Keep in mind too that Jesus was dining at the home of a Pharisee, a man who was a declared enemy of Jesus. This man would have liked nothing better than to find something he could use against Jesus. But notice his reaction to the woman washing Jesus’ feet. He didn’t say, “Hey everybody, look. Here’s a man who enjoys familiarity with a prostitute.” What he said was, “If this guy were a real prophet, he would know who and what sort of woman this is who is touching him.” Why? Because there was nothing in Jesus that would lead even His enemies to believe there was any kind of enjoyment in Him at being touched by a sinful woman. So I reject the notion straight away that Jesus was in any way enjoying this action, at least not in the sense you suggest.

Linda, the point I was originally trying to make, and three years in retrospect maybe I haven’t done such a good job of making it, is that I am greatly concerned about the shallowness of our worship, because to me it is an indicator of the shallowness of the average Christian. I am NOT saying worship cannot be emotional. If it’s from the heart it most certainly will touch an emotional chord. But my emotions ought to be the caboose, not the engine driving the train. Worship is a reflection of the heart. If my relationship with Jesus Christ is shallow then my worship will be shallow. If my relationship runs deep, then my worship will reflect the depth of my love for Him.

Your example of the woman who worshiped Jesus by washing and kissing His feet and by drying them with her hair is a great example of that. Go back and read what Jesus had to say to Simon the Pharisee. Jesus used the example of two men who owed debts they couldn’t pay; one man owed a lot of money and one man owed a little. Both men had their debts forgiven by the moneylender. Jesus asked Simon, “Now which of them will love him more?” Simon replied, “I would imagine that the one who is forgiven the greatest loves the most.”

Then Jesus drives home His point. In those days it was customary for the host to enable his guests to wash the dust off their feet after coming inside. Jesus said to Simon, “When I entered your house, you gave me no water for my feet, but this woman has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair.” In those days it was also customary to greet a guest with a kiss. Jesus said to Simon, “You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet.” In those days it was customary to provide a guest with oil for his head. Jesus said to Simon, “You didn’t anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment.”

Do you see the point Jesus is making here? For someone who was raised in a Christian home, been a Christian all their life, and who doesn’t have a life of sin to look back on, their level of gratitude for forgiveness is a little. But for somebody who’s lived a sorted, wicked past and has been rescued and transformed in Christ, their level of love and gratitude is at a whole different level. Jesus says, “Look, you just saw love like you’ve never seen it before.”

Nobody did things like that. It was absolutely unheard of. What would make somebody so loving? What would make somebody so lavish, so grateful? This is almost over the top. This is almost bizarre. Weeping all over somebody, wiping their feet with their hair, holding on and never letting go. Why is so much love being poured out? Jesus simple answer is, “Because somebody who has been forgiven much, loves much and this woman whose sins were many has been forgiven; for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little, only loves little.”

And Linda, that’s exactly my point. Now I’m not saying you have to have a sorted past in order to really love Jesus. But if we really love the Lord like we say we do, we oughta go far deeper in our worship than mere emotionalism and shallow expressions of love. It oughta be demonstrated in our willingness to serve Him and expressed in our desire to honor Him. That’s how the sinful woman expressed her gratefulness, her adoration, her worship if you will. And we should too.